Warning: Alcohol abuse (one characrter gets smashed), scenes of explicit sexual nature. Info given by JKR in subsequent interviews about Percy’s future (wife and kids and all) is disregarded.
Word Count: 4,098
Summary: As far as Percy is concerned, Oliver hasn’t ever cared for anything beside Quidditch. When Oliver brings a date to Harry and Ginny’s wedding, however, Percy is resolved that if Oliver is capable of noticing other blokes romantically, he should be one of them. Unfortunately, Percy is very stale at wooing, and Oliver isn’t looking for what Percy is prepared to give.
A/N: This was written for the wonderful loony4lupin in the awesome community hp_spring_fling. Hers was one of the coolest prompts I've had to work with in a while, requesting "a blue sparkly dildo" for object, "bottom of the bottle" for place, and "plaid" for theme. Some other things that were requested included sunflowers, topping from the bottom, snark, unusual situations, awkwardness, alcohol, dirty talk, tattoos, sun, family scenes, Molly Weasley in all forms, Hogwarts, minor angst and UST. I had a lot of fun writing this. Enjoy! ♥